Scooby Dudes

Scooby Dudes - Episode 49: Daphne & Velma - Title Card by Evan Yeong

Tobias Bloom’s employees didn’t mind that he required a prop for his chin at all times. They didn’t even mind that he insisted it look like a human hand. What they hated was Bloom’s insistence that it clearly be someone else’s hand.

You can learn anything at Ridge Valley High. Anything, that is, except how to dispose of garbage without putting your hand all the way into the bin.

Daphne & Velma - Title Card

Daphne was always so excited to chat with Velma.

The feeling was mutual.

The question-mark-shaped scars were a cruel reminder of the fateful night when Carol’s parents were murdered by The Riddler. The night she became . . .

The Girl Who Lived?

Daphne’s dad upon being asked what kind of fashion statement he is trying to make.

The AI in the robot is so advanced that it actually deploys nano-repulsors from its palm, allowing it to literally hover-hand.

Like most schools, Ridge Valley High based its ranking design on that of microtransaction-heavy mobile games.

Sometimes, if Velma closed her eyes and wished real hard, she could still hear Daphne’s voice, like the scent of tulips on the wind:

“Velma, please stop pretending I’m dead. I’m sorry I said your jacket was lame.”

Despite Daphne’s sincere request, Spencer went right back to talking dirty to his food before eating it.

Seriously who is choosing this guy’s outfits?

A 24-year-old playing a 26-year-old pretending to be a high school student dressed like a quilt sewn together by Boo Radley.

Spencer goes from the smartest kid in school to the smartest person in the current presidential administration.

A LOW-HANGING FRUIT? DON’T MIND IF I DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

It’s sad how girls can’t even goo out without guys judging them.

*guitar from Roundabout by Yes begins playing*

Everyone later agreed to give Spencer a re-do at coming out of the closet.

Not even the great Tobias Bloom could look good in school photos.

The scene which canonically connects Daphne & Velma to A New Hope.

Coincidentally, this is the exact same design as the tramp-stamp on the flank of the self-insert character in my My Little Pony fan fiction.

Or, it is now.

Griffith looks directly at the camera and into the viewer’s soul/libido.

Witnesses weren’t swayed by Coach Williams’ defence that “junk” and “trash” are synonymous with one another.

Griffith reminds us that jocks aren’t just stupid bullies; they can be stupid sweethearts, too.

The Monstarz come upon Stan Podolak hiding in their locker room (Space Jam, 1996)

This guy is perhaps both the funniest character in the film and also the most realistic character in the film.

Velma is either unfashionable or more fashionable than the human mind can grasp.

Velma didn’t care what Daphne thought. Paste was the perfect ballgame snack.

Daphne and Velma are shocked to find that the secret laboratory houses the vine-tangled corpse of Clayton from Tarzan.

Although conservative estimates put the total in the tens of thousands, it is not clear precisely how many nightmares this scene has inspired.

Chris Rock’s comedy documentary Good Hair would go on to receive the Special Jury Prize for a Documentary at the 2009 Sundance Film Festival.

Nothing could stop Velma once her rampage began, not even Tony Stark’s Hulkbuster.

The coolest thing about this movie is how Velma’s physicality perfectly matches Ryan Gosling’s in Drive, regardless of the scene.

“Yeah well I’d rather be a criminal mastermind than a law-abiding servant-brain like you,” Carol cleverly retorted.

Jock #2 suddenly realizes that the CTE he is developing from playing football will not only prevent him from career success off the field but will impact his relationships, quality of life, and will even deprive him of the mental faculties required to hold the football industry accountable for its wilfully unsafe practices, ultimately enabling the ruinous exploitation of future child athletes.

Not many people know that The Ring is just a re-cut of Titanic.