Scooby Dudes

Scooby Dudes - Episode 37: "Scooby's Peep-Hole Pandemonium / The Hand of Horror" - Title Card by Napassorn Sinsiri

That's right, our first introduction to Scooby on this show is a trench coat-clad figure in a poorly lit alley.

The New Scooby-Doo Mysteries - Season 1, Episode 2: "Scooby's Peep-Hole Pandemonium" - Title Card by Unknown

Part 1 Episode Title by Someone Who Should Have Known Better

As the title card said, story by Cynthia Friedlob & John Semper.

What the title card didn't disclose: directed by Quentin Tarantino.

Orson Kane accuses one of his employees of being Carmen Sandiego in disguise.

Daphne gently reminds her employer that Scooby is colour blind. Scooby impatiently awaits her follow-up statement that there isn't anything wrong with that.

MRW I'm a waiter at an EA Games cocktail party and I need to serve the boss' daughter but I haven't paid for the DLC to unlock her yet.

Even faced with death Scooby appreciates a solid homonym gag. 

Sure, Maid Mummy lived, died, and was ceremonially entombed in an age without silverware. And yes, a few millennia of decomposition have softened her attention to detail.

But this job is out-and-out slipshod. If Maid Mummy didn't turn out to be the villain of this episode anyway, I trust she still would have gone to prison.

"Oh grandmother, what big eyes you have!"

"All the better to fail sobriety tests with, my dear."

In the absence of a spelling-based homonym joke, Scooby is terrified.

Painter: So you want it in clean, straightforward block letters-

Norma Deathman: And a sans-serif font, please. I'm going for something more "legible" than "Jezebel".

Scooby had and would never find Shaggy giving him a pretend Hitler moustache with his finger to be funny.

Left side: Trump's response to factual information.

Ride side: Trump's response to hunger pangs.

The animators briefly strike.

Since I couldn't make a gif of this you'll just have to imagine the camera lovingly zooming in on Orson Kane's feet.

First Animator: "How do fangs work?"

Second Animator: "OK so basically vampires just have one giant tooth on the top row which extends down into two symmetrical fang-like spikes. And keep in mind that these teeth extend way lower past the lips than you would expect on a human. And-"

First Animator: "Never mind."

The New Scooby-Doo Mysteries - Season 1, Episode 2: "The Hand of Horror" - Title Card by Unknown

With the chorus of pizza toppings echoing throughout the van, Daphne fantasizes jerking the steering wheel from Shaggy's grasp.

Krämer busts into Jërry's apartment on the set of German Seinfeld.

Shaggy: "So, like, what are you wearing?"

Scooby: "Reah! Rescribe your routfit!"

As the delivery man, Louie should be the last person to be surprised that there's a pizza in the box.

The taller of the Von Gizmo twins offers a full-throated defense of his "loyal, if quite homely" brother. 

Shaggy was disappointed to find that a million dollars did not appear when he pressed the button is pressed.

Most likely, Shaggy figured, the button and the man who gave it to him were frauds. "Press this button and you will receive a million dollars. HOWEVER someone you do not know will die," the mysterious man had said.

Although Shaggy was million-dollar-less, he still liked to imagine that the button held a little bit of magic. Sometimes he would keep it in his pocket while walking at the park and press it, just to see if anyone keeled over. No one ever did and Shaggy never got a million dollars. But in his heart, he hoped that somewhere out there strangers were dying.

Scooby squeezes his eyes tightly shut, unwilling to witness one of the Helping Hands enact ddong chim on his best friend.

Do not ever serve someone pizza like this.

DO NOT EVER EAT PIZZA LIKE THIS

Believe it or not, dear readers, but this is NOT a pornographic image. 

Ah, wait! No, no it isn't.

But then if you look from this angle-!

No, still just two gloves.

Ratfield hated the Von Gizmo twins for their wealth, careers, and fricking baller labcoats.

The semi-visible hand of the market persuades Hanna-Barbera executives to scrap Scrappy.

We can only imagine from the twitching topography of Louie's traumatized expression what was actually happening in this final scene.